The Existential Fault in Manliness

Photo belongs to en.wikipedia.org.

Woah there! Jumping in a little deep, are we?

Well, yes and no. After much thinking on the subject of things that are manly, I came to the conclusion that manliness is quite a shallow quality. As I mentioned before, manliness and masculinity are inherently subjective. They are at the will of social constructions and ultimately individual preferences. This is the mountain I'd like to get over before proceeding with the overall discussion. 

Now, before you philosophy students start verbally brutalizing my fast and loose grasp on the concept, I must point out that I am no philosopher, nor have I ever been a student thereof. I could only begin to scratch the surface of the underlying principles of existentialism and my use of it in this case will only be superficial at best. So, bare with me. 

Existentialism, and I am paraphrasing, basically means all matter that exists have no meaning apart from what the individual would ascribe to them. A rose isn't a symbol of love until someone comes by and gives it that meaning. The cigar is just a cigar, as both Freud and Kierkegaard would have you think. However, I posit that the individual does not have entire control of existing semiotics. Much of the symbols we uphold are culturally constructed beyond our control. The way we understand the world around us and our place in it, has little to do with our individual selves, but more to do with society as a whole.

What does all this have to do with manliness? Well, it breaks down the fundamental idea that things in our environment have inherent meaning in them. I love woodworking tools. I love a lot of different kinds of tools, powered and non-powered. Being around, talking about, using, and learning about different woodworking tools makes me feel manly. I feel more at one with the ethereal notion of manhood. When I can hold, make something with, or admire a tool, I feel a sense of manly completeness. It's mildly arousing. But woodworking and/or tools are not manly. At base value, they are what they are, just objects. My society, however, has programmed itself to think that woodworking tools are the sole concern of the male population and not of the female population. This is quickly changing. 

I'm not going to go into the changing statistics of women in woodworking as that is beyond the scope of this particular post. My conclusion is that the intrinsic flaw when talking about things that have the quality of "manliness" is there is no way to measure, define, or quantify manliness. As modern society changes and progresses, we are learning that what was considered masculine or feminine are merely clumsy vestiges of an antiquated and destructive system of gender roles. 

What I see when I read other blogs about masculinity and male culture is misplaced frustration. It leads to a dangerous habit of arbitrarily defining who is and who is not the good guy and that a false sense of identity is under attack. Discussions about the role of men and women and shifting gender roles are daunting and can definitely be frustrating for both sides. What we have to keep in mind is that the ongoing discussion of gender roles is not meant to infringe upon anyone's rights or to diminish the affluence of one group of people, but to empower both sides to do more and live richer, and more fulfilling lives. 

But you can do whatever you wanna do. 

Best wishes! 

Men and Housekeeping

Picture belongs to blackeiffel.blogspot.com

It's a real shame that good house keeping techniques aren't encouraged in young men beyond the "man cave" and the garage. Just a few days ago, my mother was telling me about home economics classes that were required of high school girls in the 1940s and 50s. However, this is especially pertinent now that people are getting married later and that divorce rates are up. More and more people are single and living by themselves.

It seems as though the responsibility of cooking, or keeping the house looking nice are only under the authority and only the concerns of the female. The kitchen is the domain of women and not of men. It's not just simple chores. Even the simple act of picking out a bed spread or buying towels that match the shower curtain are deemed unbecoming of men and effeminate. This is just not true.

This idea that there are home making activities that are beneath men is deeply rooted in sexism and homophobia. Its the idea that home making is emasculating, and this is perpetuated in media. Take a minute to go to Google. Do an image search for "home making" and count how many images are clearly geared toward female audiences. I know that this is anecdotal evidence but I think it speaks volumes.

There are few things more manly than taking pride and care in one's surroundings. Keeping up order and appearances can lead to a better peace of mind. Also, a man who cares about what enters his body isn't a wuss or a sissy. Manly cooking isn't all about fatty foods and beasts cooked over an open flame, as amazing as that is.

Discussions about gender roles should not be had to condemn or demonize a group of people, even when they are about the very people that facilitated those gender roles. They are meant to empower both sides to live richer and more fulfilling lives. Be a man, and take pride in your house or where ever you dwell.

God loves it when we take the time to care for and honor His creation. When He entrusts us with an estate or a home, man or woman, it is our duty to take care of it, regardless of how temporary it may be.

Best wishes!

For an example of a great man in a kitchen, check out Chef John at FoodWishes. No I'm not being paid to say that. He really is awesome. 

Welcome!

Welcome to my new blog! I suppose I should start off by introducing myself a bit. My name is Kevin. I'm a white (whatever that means), heterosexual male. As of this post, I am 22 years old. I am a recent college graduate. I stand at about 6'2" (187 cm for the rest of the world). I am chaotic-neutral. Lastly, I am a Christian.

If you, male/female/some-where-in-between, are looking for any of the following:

• A whiny men's rights blog,
• Bro talk,
• Advice on how to make unwanted advances on women,
• Penile enhancement,
• Misandry,
• Euphoria,
• Fat/slut/age/etc. shaming,

...then you are in the wrong place. In this blog, I will certainly touch on most, if not all, of those topics in the future, but I'm just flying by the seat of my pants at the moment. As of yet, there are no guarantees. But what you will find are my opinions, and I mean my opinions*, on what masculinity means and the role of men in in modern society. I do not call myself one, but you will find that I do not differ greatly from the typical ideals of most feminists. I will cover many topics relating to masculinity ranging from simply vapid to deeply esoteric. I will make commentary on social change and societal norms, but I will also share some of the things that make me feel like a man in a modern context.

You may also find that I derive many of my ideas of masculinity from my religion. I am a fairly liberal Christian, but I do think that the actions of Christ Himself speak volumes about how God intended men to conduct themselves. I won't spoil too much, but it may look a lot different than what you might expect.

Let me be very clear. I wish not to lay out a list of rules for men to follow in order to be manly, or to insinuate that men who do not fit my standards are not manly enough. Manliness is subjective. Masculinity is likewise. In even the most virulent masculine media, one can find a slew of inconsistencies on what men think is manly. I only stand to help create a safe place for logical and reasonable discussion of the role of men in modern society.

I also wish to point out that women are welcome and encouraged to take part in this discussion. A discussion without varying points of view is nothing but nonsensical chatter. I hope to hear (read) opinions of women on the modern role of men.

Lastly, in all that I am and all that I wish to be, I hope to set a good example for others who are or who aspire to be the same things as I. If I want people to respect me as a man or respect manhood in general, I must act respectably. I represent all of my cultures, ascribed and avowed, by my outward actions.

I look forward to new discussions, good or bad. They're all entertaining to some degree.

Best wishes!



* OPINIONS! noun -a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge.